For the last 30 years, I have lived and worked in foreign countries such as Hong Kong, Thailand, China, and Vietnam. I have been an ex-pat or expatriate for my entire adult life and working career.
As an ex-pat, there are things you miss out on from your home country, family events, and other life-important events. As an ex-pat, sometimes you can feel like an outsider in your host country, and life can be lonely as you are away from family and friends.
Table of Contents
- 7 Real-Life Examples of Why Being An Expat Can Be So Hard
- 1- As An Expat, You Are Away From Your Family
- 2 – Living In Another Culture Is Not Always Easy
- 3. – As An Expat, You Can Feel Like An Outsider
- 4. – Being An Expat Can Be Lonely
- 5 – Life Overseas Will Not Be the Same As Home
- 6. – Finding A New Support Network Is Not Always Easy
- 7 – As An Expat, You May Miss Out On Some Support Systems
- Related Questions
Finding friends and a support system in your ex-pat location may not always be easy, and you may miss out on essential services that are easy for you to get at home but almost impossible in your host country.
7 Real-Life Examples of Why Being An Expat Can Be So Hard
Relocating to a foreign country can create many opportunities for yourself and your family, but living abroad doesn’t come without its challenges. Making such a significant life change should not be taken lightly; being an ex-pat forces you out of your comfort zone and introduces unfamiliar situations with which you must learn how to cope.
At times, it can be quite overwhelming! Read on to discover things I have learned about life while being an expat overseas for most of my adult life.
1- As An Expat, You Are Away From Your Family
One of the hardest things about being an ex-pat is that you are away from your family.; this is hard if you have a family that is exceptionally close and does a lot together. As an ex-pat, you will miss out on some important family events.
As I look back on being an ex-pat, there are many family vacations, funerals, birthdays, weddings, and family reunions that I could not attend. The truth is that as an expert, you will miss out on many of these things as it may be too complicated, costly, or difficult to come home for every single one of these family events.
As an ex-pat, one of the first things you must realize is that you will miss out on family events; It is just the nature of being an ex-pat and, for most ex-pats, a part of life overseas.
2 – Living In Another Culture Is Not Always Easy
It is not always easy to live and work in another culture. In some places, the culture can be very similar to the one you grew up with. In other parts of the world, everything from the food to how you greet someone can be different.
Some people enjoy other cultures and can thrive in another; they embrace the new culture and want to learn everything about it. Some other people feel threatened or scared by the culture, so they spend most of their time indoors or pretending they are not living overseas but still at home.
I have seen ex-pat families where the husband loved living and working overseas, but the wife was so afraid of living overseas that she hardly left the house. In some extreme cases, the wife became very depressed.
When living as an ex-pat, your success or failure also depends upon your partner and how they can handle life overseas and live in another culture. Living in another culture is not always easy, and if your partner or family cannot handle living overseas, it will make your life much more difficult.
3. – As An Expat, You Can Feel Like An Outsider
As an ex-pat, you will generally always be an outsider. I have spent all my adult life living and working in Asia, so in every place I have lived in Asia, I have always been an outsider.
For some people, feeling like they are an outsider can be extremely difficult. I know how uncomfortable having someone stare at me or pinch and poke me on the street because I am a foreigner. I have blonde hair, and so many times, strangers touch and stroke my hair. This can all be highly unnerving if you are not used to it.
It can hurt if strangers start to talk to you about how you are too fat, or your nose is too big, or some other part of your physical appearance or body. This can be common in many cultures, as they may not see this as an insult but just how they talk.
These are all the kinds of things that many ex-pats deal with daily. For some people, this is a hard thing to handle.
4. – Being An Expat Can Be Lonely
Being an ex-pat can be extremely lonely. I have seen people who live out in the middle of nowhere who are not lonely but love the ex-pat life. On the other hand, I have also seen other ex-pats who have lived in the middle of an ex-pat community, can hardly handle life overseas, and are extremely lonely.
Anyone considering becoming an ex-pat must understand that it can be a lonely life especially if you are away from your home and your loved ones. But it can also be a wonderful life if you can handle life overseas and make new friends while overseas.
5 – Life Overseas Will Not Be the Same As Home
There may be things that you enjoy doing in your home country that is just impossible or very difficult or almost impossible for you to do overseas. Living overseas will usually not be the same as your life at home.
One of them that comes to mind is sports. Some sports you like to do at home may be more difficult overseas. Other things may be the shopping is difficult, or you can not find the ingredients or other things you need.
Overseas, you may not be able to drive yourself around, or you may have a driver drive you everywhere; there can be a loss of independence. Some people may miss the freedom to get into the car and drive anywhere.
Life overseas will not be the same as your life at home, and you cannot expect it to be the same. It will be different, and there will be things you must sacrifice or give up.
6. – Finding A New Support Network Is Not Always Easy
As an ex-pat, finding a support network is not always easy. Some ex-pats may find a support network and friends by attending a church or through their work. If you are working at the US Embassy, there is usually quite a bit of support within the Embassy community. If you are like me and attend church, you can generally find a support network through your church community.
Finding a support network is one of the most important things for your success as an ex-pat; for some ex-pats, finding this support network is challenging.
7 – As An Expat, You May Miss Out On Some Support Systems
Even if you have a support network, there may be essential services or support you miss out on or are unavailable overseas. One of them that comes to mind is that if you have a child with special needs, you may find that getting the support and education they need overseas is extremely difficult, if not almost impossible.
Suppose you are dealing with psychological or other health problems. In that case, finding adequate medical or other support that you need overseas might be very difficult or almost impossible. Many companies will not even send you overseas if you or your family have these special needs.
I have been an ex-pat for many years and enjoy living overseas. Being an ex-pat has changed and improved my life in countless ways.
But because I have been an ex-pat for so long, I also fully know how difficult living in another country and culture can be.
Simply put, life overseas is not for everyone. And that is OK. You must understand if life overseas is right for you and your family.
At A Bus On A Dusty Road, we talk about travel, life, and ex-pat living. We are all about “Living Life As A Global Citizen.” We explore social, cultural, and economic issues and travel.
We would love to have you be part of our community. Sign up for our newsletter to keep up-to-date by clicking here. If you have any questions, you can contact me, Anita, by clicking here.
Listen to our Podcast called Dusty Roads. You can find it on all major podcast platforms. Try out listening to one of our podcasts by clicking here.
Subscribe to our A Bus On A Dusty Road YouTube Channel with great videos and information by clicking here.
Related Questions
What Is The Difference Between A Foreigner, Immigrant, and Ex-pat?
A foreigner is someone who was born in or from a country other than their own. An immigrant is someone from another country who plans to live in a country other than their own country permanently. An ex-pat or expatriate is living and working in a country other than their own country. Both an immigrant and ex-pat are usually considered foreigners.
You can learn more by reading What Is The Difference Between A Foreigner, Immigrant, and Ex-pat? by clicking here.
Why Become An Ex-pat And Live Overseas?
The main 8 reasons to become an ex-pat are 1) a sense of adventure, 2) experience other cultures, 3) it is a great lifestyle. 4) open your eyes to the world. 5) can find a great community, 6) can help develop your career, 7) there will be opportunities you will not get otherwise, and 8) it has become easier to be an ex-pat.
You can discover more by reading 8 Main Reasons To Become An Ex-pat And Live Overseas by clicking here.